In the complex trajectory of life, entering your twenties is like stepping into the unknown world. In Pretty Obvious Podcast's episode "Things I Wish I Knew In My Twenties with Zara Carbonell", life in your twenties is depicted to be a transformative decade full of whirlwind experiences. It is a time of self-discovery filled with triumphs and missteps.
As young adults, people often view hindsight as 20/20, failing to acknowledge that it also comes with uncertainty and mistakes. Hearing Zara Carbonell's journey offers solace to countless young and old women who find comfort in knowing that even those they admire have faced life's storms. It serves as a reminder that shadows once lurked even in the brightest stars.
In the woven threads of self-discovery, life, friendship, and love, the future remains unknown, a puzzle yet to be solved, a canvas yet to be painted. Like the ruins of the past, we cannot alter what has been, but through podcasts like "Things I Wish I Knew In My Twenties," people might find solace and guidance to navigate the journey ahead.
Here are the hard-earned lessons to lay a strong foundation for a fulfilling twenties:
– Life –
Ninety percent of life you can't control, and you have to learn to be okay with it.
As young adults, people often feel in control–with bold strokes, we paint our dreams with vibrant hues. Yet, life holds dissimilar shades of uncertainty, reminding us that even in the most lavish canvas with the loudest hues, our will is but a whisper in the wind and can be washed away by the tides of time. We must learn to embrace the unknown, for life's a grand symphony, with destiny dancing wild and free, leaving little room for our perfect plans.
You can't create a situation on your own. You have to hold yourself accountable because you can't undo things, but you can prevent things from affecting your relationship.
One of the most meaningful life lessons is that we cannot create situations alone. Just as we cannot control the waves, we cannot dictate the circumstances around us. When driven by anger, we tend to point fingers and blame others, failing to acknowledge that we are equally accountable. Every choice we make, every word we speak, and every action we take, like ripples in a pond, have the potential to create a chain reaction. Therefore, it is essential to be mindful of our behavior and to strive to make positive choices that contribute to our well-being and the well-being of others. We may find ourselves adrift, buffeted by forces beyond our control. But amid these turbulent waves, we have the power to steer our course and make choices that shape our fate.
– Friendship –
You need people to tell you the parts of you that need to go and need to stay.
In life, it is crucial to choose the people we surround ourselves with, for they are like mirrors that reflect our image, revealing the parts of ourselves that we might not recognize or fully understand. As we navigate life, our blank canvas becomes cluttered with layers of paint, some vibrant and exquisite, others faded and chipped, representing our desires, fears, hopes, and regrets. When we face uncertainties, it is where others come in--to point out the faded colors that need refreshing, the chipped areas that need repairing, and the layers that might be obscuring the true masterpiece beneath. Through them, we identify the parts of ourselves that are no longer serving our highest good and those that make us unique and special. So, the next time you feel lost, try to seek out the reflections of others and let them help you uncover the true masterpiece within.
– Love –
In college, you meet a guy and get along so well that everything feels like a movie; you grow up and realize you are not on the same page.
Love can often feel like a cinematic experience, especially in your twenties; when you meet someone who fits seamlessly into your narrative, it is as if the universe has aligned, creating a perfect match. The chemistry is electric, the connection profound, and everything seems to fall into place with effortless grace. Yet, as life's complexities unfold, the reality of the situation may diverge from the idealized script. The adage "wrong timing, right person" often rings true, for you may have found the perfect companion, but the timing may be off; however, it is a fallacy we have to acknowledge because, more often than not, it's a case of "wrong timing, wrong person."
Great loves are usually high energy, and high spirit that when it fails, it crashes--there's no stability in it.
Great love often takes us to exhilarating heights, fostering intense passion, excitement, and a sense of boundless energy. It is as if we are soaring through the clouds, unaware of the potential dangers lurking below. Its intensity and heightened emotions generate instability, making it susceptible to crumbling. With this, great love, no matter how captivating, is not the kind of love that endures. It burns brightly for a time, and we become oblivious to the menace of ashes and disappointment it brings.
True love is sustainable and quiet.
In contrast with great love, true love is characterized by its depth, stability, and strength. It is like a steady ship that sails through the stormy seas of life with a calm and unwavering course. It withstands the test of time and grows deeper with each passing day. This type of love is firmly grounded and does not bring a tempestuous storm. It is a love that nourishes and sustains rather than consumes and exhausts. It is a commitment that transcends the superficial and delves into the depths of the soul.
Love and heartbreak, a catalyst for personal growth, suggests that even in the face of loss, love can stimulate positive change. And for all it's worth, we must embrace uncertainty, learn from the past, and build sustainable relationships to navigate life with more wisdom and maturity.
Written by Franzel Daleon